08/27.24


takes me a long time to figure people out sometimes.







08/14.24


august 14 is one of my favourite dates...
sleep would have been nice instead of a ringing spininng head and aching body















aug 13

should i care that they didn't ask me to come?
i'm gonna try not. would i have asked if they were going?
hmmmm, i don't think i would have, but if i was planing to be with the three of them, i would have..












aug 12

let's see.
what have i done, little poots....



nevermind what you've done...
what are you still doing?

...
You still have the oldest english blog on earth.
(they don't know. they don't care)

...
You are trying to go viral on social media
(Has one of them ever asked your channel and supported it?
Nope.)

...
You take care of two adults.
Does either of them understand?


..
You have a beautiful cottage...
Have they actually asked to come see it?
You have asked to see their things...You have seen them all.
Do they care about yours, nope. They are jealous.


....
YOU LIVE in the city they think they own.
they come to see things almost every week.
Do they ever once message you to stop by
Never once.
How many times have you stopped at their house?
Probably 2 thousand. Maybe more.



...
Your ex died..
Do they ever mention him?
One does, once a year)
Do they know how much you love him?
(Nope. clueless. have never once asked) in four years....



and...
What have you done

• moved to LA
  
• travelled to Europe about 10 times
• Travelled to:
• Las Vegas
• Hungary
• Stockholm
• Myrtle Beach
• New York
• Washington 3 times
• Spain
• social media

aug. 11
pride parade
andrea bday
he drank my milk
and i lay in bed looking forwaard to getting my coffee and coming back to slowly wake up
but no no no
doesn't happen
i really hate my life sometimes.

but i have a few new rules in my life

2. if you have your clothes on top of the clean hand and face towels i washed, folded, put away and then hung in the bathroom on the door...
        I'm gonna wipe my face and hands on your clothes
3. i clean the whole house all week long but on the weekends, nope, nada.
4. I do what I wanna do, whe I wanna and can) do it.

 






i did alot
before they did it
i used to do it all
but no one does much
do they.

                    august 10
                        8:59am
                        why the fuck do i have to keep hitting the tab
                        soon i will have a new laptop
                        i will be able to type on it
                        although to be honest, typing is so inefficient i hate typing at age 58

                        after typing for 50 years lol
                       
                        i'm starting to hate my own brain
                        sensors
                        nothing they will do or say will interest me
                        i was there in 2004
                        I do it all first... (ok not all but alot. he's never been to nyc. he doesn't like nyc. why? i know why. ) (cannot write it here)
                        that will be my reason for not going...
                        Andrea doesn't want to go. Chloe doesn't want to go. my mother doesn't want to go....
                        I messaged two cousins, no response,

                        So.... why should I go?