my E l e c t r o n i c
pen
d |e |c |e
|m |b |e r 2 017
i
December 27
we live in a world where
no one likes to talk about ideas
they are avoided like a
winter plague
from the depths of your
mind, you avoid them
they make you suffer; and
your avoiding them
makes me suffer, too.
http://www.onegreenplanet.org/reviews/vegan-and-gluten-free-palak-paneer/
http://www.onegreenplanet.org/vegan-food/recipe-masoor-dal/
http://www.onegreenplanet.org/vegan-food/recipe-vegan-paneer-tikka-masala/
http://www.onegreenplanet.org/vegan-recipe/south-indian-style-kurma/
http://maayeka.com/2017/12/achari-gobhi-recipe.html
December 23
It’s festivus on this wintry day
The trickle of the fish
filter, the hum of the space heater, and the CBC 9 oclock
news compete for my eardrums
In my mind everything happens at once; the future battles to pay less money; the
eating of the fruit; and the dining of the party
While I modulate her
fears, her frustrations, and mine, all wrapped into a bundle
And protecting him at
the same time
I would have liked to
have heard the news
I would have bought
headphones
I cannot believe the
limit of money
It reminds me of death
While this song plays
in the back of my mind
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=IPfJnp1guPc
December 20
arrived in time for chaos
even after the shiny warm
wind whipped my cheeks
and if people don’t do what they care about
what is it, that they do?
December 18
time has returned to
Christmas for me
a tree stands on its own
and it cost twenty dollars
time has returned to
morning
I am here
aren’t i
time has returned my
singing
ha-le-lu-jah
time and the perception of
time
are always strange no
matter the time
December 15
The internet has
claimed my brain
…
I tried to stay in a
world of logic
Then I fell out
Do democrats really
need a new roadmap?
Since when does one
need a roadmap towards reason?
When did the need to
justify brains rise to power?
Directors sit in
meetings and instead of returning with information
They return with
‘extreme concerns’ – emotional responses to a bits and bytes situation
And they are paid
handsomely, until emotions are no longer the lifeblood…
December 14
Thank you, universe,
for that dream about daphne trasler
Thank you, for the reflection
of myself in the bus window where I looked like a cool lesbian
Thank you for the
small, yellow, stained, cloth purse that she was zipping open and closed
Thank you for the
cherry chocolates Rose
Let it be known that
On December 13th
2017 at 6:45 pm
she said that she does not
understand people with perfect lives and who are happy that way
That it would be so
boring.
And that her father
Looked at me and said
“more
stressful than money?!” “humph”!
As though there is no
possibility in this wide, wide, universe
That anything, could
possibly be more stressful
Than a parking ticket.
in double-digits December presses on
I run fingers through unwashed hair;
to the rhythm of flashing electronics
the gurgling of fishwater
and a beeping, dying battery\
this morning’s bitter coffee brought me back to a short moment
in Hungary
in 2001. A woman from Albuquerque, whom I’ve spoken about
before,
rented a very minute flat surrounded by pigeons and their dirt.
She owned one fork, one spoon, and one book, whose name
escapes me now
About a British woman who once lived in a similar flat
just after the communist regime
I own over a hundred forks
But I still think of her
of the forced simplicity
of the simpler struggles
of the physical labour
of the time spent
and of the the things I don’t want
to think about
and
because one fork is enough for one
Is it not
06:47AM
she
rushes out the door
it’s not yet 8
a sleeping man snores
I take care of them
Though we are all separate
How did I get here
As a caregiver with no life without them
she didn’t like the
broom holding her sofa together
but really nothing
was holding her life together
tied to a salary I
hate to love
ever wake up and realize
you drank your lie away
d e
c e m b e r 3
the most important thing is to be objective
that is, to
stand back and view the wholeness
there is a
wholeness, to the life, when we see it or not
even as we watch
Okeanos diving to the bottom of the floor
and as you move
in your innocent world where nothing else matters
as I sweep through the past the present and the future
as part of my new life
we sit across a small wooden table
purchased
at IKEA in Dersden Germany
and
exchange music from another time
from
a beautiful, tired, and scared
18:56pm
Saturday December 2, 2017-12-02
___________________________________
and
they go faster than ever before
it’s
almost like they’re over before they begin